I can't believe that I have been so busy on Sunday's for the past four Sunday's in a row. I hadn't gone to church in a whole month until today! I missed it. A lot. Toby talked about listening to God and how the thought of God speaking to us makes some uneasy, but the thought of him doing miracles is just normal. Long story short, we spent some time in silence, a chance for us to hear what He has been trying to tell us. To be honest, I always do feel nervous about moments like this. I get scared, not of what He will say, but that He won't say anything at all. I sat there in my seat with my head bowed and simply asked God, "What do you want me to know about myself that is keeping me from growing?"... I got an answer. Instantly. I had never felt more confident that it was actually God speaking to me. It was truly the first time. I won't say exactly what He said, but it has really changed my future. It has reassured me and helped me believe that I am good enough. Today was good. Really really good.
The planning of college. Unfortunately, I didn't get into my dream school and number one choice. Surprisingly, I'm more than okay with it. I was upset, of course, but I know that once I get to Blinn, I'll realize why I'm not supposed to be at A&M quite yet. I trust in God enough to know that this Blinn is where I need to be. At least for a year. :) So, I'm very excited for this next chapter in my life.
The choir lock-in was last night and it was pretty fun! It's spring break! :) That's a good thing in itself. And I'm possibly going to look for apartments in College Station with the bff sometime this week! YAY! Basically, this week is much needed and MUCH appreciated!
I woke up this morning to check the A&M website. I do this every morning and at least 30 times throughout the day. It's my dream. It's all I've wanted to do since I saw my brother (and role model) attend A&M. So, I check the website to find that I have finally reached step 4! (Communicate Admissions Decision) Sounds good, right? Well I've heard that there's a link underneath that you can click and it will say if you got in or not. Mine didn't have the link. Everyone I know so far that has gotten in, had the link.
I guess we'll see in a few days.
To top it off, my mother was being a total debbie downer about it trying to prepare me for if I don't get in. I understand where she's coming from, and she doesn't want me to be disappointed... But I'm a big girl and I feel like this experience is definitely a once in a lifetime thing. I am going to be grateful no matter what. I know that I will still end up in a good place and get a good education. I have prayed about this for so long now and I've never wanted anything more in my life. It's thrilling but also frightening to know that my life is about to change. I am ready.
All I have to do is keep telling myself that God has a bigger plan than I have for myself.